38 weeks!

With only 2 more weeks to go, I can see that there are positives about this pregnancy (besides that we are going to be blessed with a little girl very, very soon!).

* I do not have heartburn!

* No swelling in my feet and cankles!

* I have boys that are old enough to play by themselves. As I write this, they are outside playing with sponges.

Weird things that are happening that didn't happen with the other two:

* Leakage. I have no control over it- I'm pretty sure it's pee.

* I need much food a lot of the time, like 6 regular meals a day (but admittedly, it's been less intense the last two weeks).

8 weeks to go.

My pregnancy has been uneventful lately which is why I haven't posted anything. What's going on with pregnant Leah?:
* Vericose vein? Still there. Yuck.
* I'm eating ALL the time. Most of the time, it's healthy food, but I definitely have a treat or two a day in addition to all the healthy food. :)
* We are still not sure about the homebirth. It appeals to me in lots of ways, but the commotion of being at home makes it not a sure thing.
* For the pregnant women out there having leg cramps- I have found a miracle cure- Liquid Magnesium Calcium. It's amazing. I can now sleep more than an hour at a time!
* Lots and lots of braxton hix contractions throughout the day. These are just practice contractions- my body is gearing up!
* I really don't think my body can be stretched much more.
* Still no name for this baby girl. I can not wait to meet her!!
* As for my attitude?- I feel like I'm doing much better thanks to all the prayers on my behalf! I still get annoyed extremely easy and am tired a lot of the time. I took a nap yesterday and Cal said, "Oh good! Now you won't be as crabby!" So sad. But a little funny, too.

My Cheering Squad

Who will be at my labor?

- Eric, my man who I love and adore. He told me last night he will do as he's told. ;)
- Laura, my good friend who wants to be a doula and is extremely supportive and patient. I got to be there when she gave birth to her baby, Max.
- Nicole, my hippie friend who gave birth at home in a tub and who will be excited and encouraging while I'm freaking out and cursing.
- Possibly my more-than-acquaintance, Tami. I see Tami a lot at parks and we have great chats. She wants to get into birth photography and is building her portfolio. She is so talented and offered to take photos of this wee one for free! To see the pics she just took of Jess' new baby, click here.
- My midwife and her aprentice(s), of course.

Birthing at Home

Why do I want to birth at home? There are lots of reasons that people give birth at home. But the main reasons is more of a logical process for me. I really wanted someone to catch my baby who I would get to know at more of a personal level than a doctor. There are lots of midwife groups up here that deliver at hospitals, but even then, you don't know who will be there to catch and coach you through the labor and they don't get there until right before you have the baby, as well. That's why I chose a birthing center. I would get to meet my midwife, have an appt with her for an hour every month (and more as it gets closer) and be guaranteed that she be the one to catch this baby girl.
Then the more I thought about the birthing center in comparison to my house, the more I realized how ridiculous it will be to get my laboring ass in the car just to drive to a location that has nothing more than my house (besides it being cleaner and having a big tub). Also, birthing centers kick you out of their house 4-6 hours after delivering because they want to get you home in bed with your new babe as soon as possible. So thinking about getting up, getting back in the car and climbing my steps to bedroom right after I have a (probably) big baby come out of my va-jay-jay doesn't sound appealing.
Also, it's a scientific fact that laboring women progress faster in a comfortable environment.
There are many other reasons why women choose to give birth at home, but these are the main reasons that I'm choosing it. I'm super excited. And nervous about the pain. But mostly excited.

Tootie Dog

My 8-year-old pup has been driving me crazy. Since I've come back from Chicago, she has high energy all day and follows me from room to room panting. When I sit down, she rushes her face into my stomach. When she hears a small noise, she barks so loud she about gives me a heart attack. I can't take it anymore. Eric thinks she senses that I'm pregnant and is being over-protective. But I just may kill her.

Coming Baby

I'm pretty sure I'm going to have this little girl at home. It seems way simpler than traveling to a different house. I'm just trying to convince Eric now. :)

Isaac Steven- born 10.27.06

Isaac's birth story:

I was sure I wanted an epidural with Ike because my last epidural was so dang awesome. My due date was November 1st and I thought that I would go early because Calvin was so early. I had lots of contractions that resulted in nothing and the hospital kept sending me home after giving me a shot of tributalin (sp?).

And just a week before my due date, a contraction hit me stronger than anything I had yet felt and I was sweaty and out of breath. Eric walked in and said, "Is it time?" when he saw the look on my face. I said, "Yes, but I need to take a shower first. I'm all sweaty." That was my big mistake. It took so long to take a shower because the contractions were immediately close together and knocked me on the ground every time. By the time we got out the door to drop Calvin off with a friend, I was in tears from the pain and so angry that I had to sit in the car.

We got to the hospital and I yelled, "This is not a drill! Please get me an epidural!" After first checking me in at triage (6 cm dialated), then hooking me up to a water IV, they told me it would be another half hour before they could get me an epidural. I started crying again because I didn't think I could make it that long. After the water was in me, they ordered the anesthesiologist and he took his sweet time getting that needle in my back. I yelled, "I can still feel the pain!" They told me it takes about 20 minutes to kick in. It finally started feeling better but I could still feel all the contractions and my right side felt fuzzy and numb. 20 minutes later it was time to push- and I felt all of it. The doctor broke my water and Ike fell down to where I could see his head in the mirror. I pushed that big kid out in a contraction and a half. 8 lbs; 10 oz.

It was a total of 3 1/2 hours from first contraction to birth.

Calvin David- born 9.27.04

First Birthday Party

Cal's birth story (long version):

Calvin's due date was October 31st, 2004. On September 23rd, I had a bad night of sleep and remembered later that I woke up moaning a couple times without really realizing why. I woke up normally and went to work- I worked at Big Brothers Big Sisters in Northwest Arkansas and we had a special event planned that Friday: A charity golf tournament. So I spent the day running around the golf course, making sure drinks were aplenty and people were happy. Around noon, though, I felt awful and my stomach hurt. I asked my boss, Melody (who was also my very good friend), "What would it feel like if I were in labor?" She answered, "Honey [southern thing to say], you would know if you were in labor!" She gave me permission to go home, however, and get some rest and then come back in the afternoon to help clean up.

I went back to my house and crashed for a couple hours- again, waking up intermittedly, moaning. I finally realized I couldn't sleep and got up to watch tv. I then realized the pains were coming quite frequently, so I started writing down the duration. By then, I started calling Eric and was getting no answer. I was a little frustrated because I wanted some reassurance but relieved, too, since this wasn't the real deal.

I finally called the hospital when the contractions were about 6 minutes apart, 30 seconds long. Some nurse told me not to worry because they needed to be a minute long. I called back when they were 4 minutes apart and 45 seconds long and they decided I should come in to get checked out (duh).

During the contractions, I took a shower, packed a bag and would sit on the couch inbetween. They weren't that strong so I was able to talk and move about, sort of freely. I finally got ahold of Eric as I was headed out the door and yelled at him, "You need to have your cell phone on you at all times! What if I was really in labor?! Meet me at the hospital." So I drove myself to the hospital- about 15 minutes away.

Eric and I went in around 5:30pm, I got hooked up to a machine and I waited. After a while, a nurse came in to tell me they were going to put me on magnesium to stop the labor and I asked, "So I'm really in labor?" She said, "Oh, honey. You don't know what's going on, do you?"

After a lot of pain and time, they offered me a drug that made me feel drunk and I HATED! Finally, they took me off the mag. and offered me an epidural at 2am which I excitedly accepted.

Four hours of interrupted sleep later, they woke me at 6am to start pushing. Since we hadn't yet gone to the birthing class, I had no idea what I was doing. The nurses were very kind and showed me what to do. Without feeling a thing, thanks to the epidural, I pushed for 15 minutes and out came Calvin David (with help from that stupid knife)- 6lbs; 3oz. He was perfectly tiny and we got to take him home the next day.

Floating

No, this isn't me. Hahaha.

Last week, I had my first "float." In St. Louis Park, there's this place called Rejoovme- a relaxation center. The float was an experience, for sure. They have these ginormous tubs that are filled with 93 degree water and 600 lbs of Epson salt. There is a big lid that you pull down over yourself, but the tub is huge, so I wasn't clausterphobic at all. You lay down, listen to ocean sounds and float. 1 hour of floating is worth four hours of sleep. Pretty amazing. I only paid for a 30 minute float and about half of that, I was trying to figure out how to relax. But I'm definitely going to do it again- next time for an hour.

Epson salt is a healing agent, too, so for any preggos with hemorroids (ahem), do it! However, as the picture of the skinny girl shows, this isn't a place just for pregnant women, although there are huge benefits to pregnant women.

PS. If you do go, please put my name down as a referral. If I get two referrals, I get a free float!

Weight Gain and stretch marks

I am eating constantly to keep from feeling terrible. And yes, I had a couple days of cupcake binging, but for the most part, I'm eating pretty healthy- lots of fruit smoothies, egg sandwiches, turkey, lettuce, tomato, cheese sandwiches, peanut butter sandwiches, and whatever is for dinner. But in the last month, I've gained 9 pounds. At this rate, I will gain a total of 54 pounds. With my other two, I gained 35. So I'm not really sure what's gonna happen.

So far, I've been able to avoid getting stretch marks to which I credit my mother and her lovely genes. But I'm thinking that if I gain 54 pounds, two piece bathing suits are long-gone...

Vericosity...

Since only ladies and my husband read this blog, and since this blog is supposed to be a honest story of this pregnancy, I have some disturbing information.

I have a vulva vericosity. That's right- a vericose vein is on my vulva. It arrived a couple weeks ago and in order to keep it from getting too inflamed and swollen, I have to eat blueberries every day. I also ordered this contraption, the V2 Supporter, to manage the pain: (No. It unfortunately does not come with the purple leotard)

Turned a Corner

I've officially turned a corner in my health. I hope. The past couple days have been different. I don't have to eat protein every hour and I don't feel pukey all day (sometimes for a bit at night, but that's it!). The bad news? Ike has croup and is up all night right now. Life is still hard because really- who doesn't need their sleep? But I'm looking forward to getting some sleep and feeling better at the same time. Aaah.

I have been showering almost daily. And I did shave.

And...

So much to say, so little energy to do it. I'm still not feeling well even though I'm 15 weeks along. But I don't take the Zofran every day so that's good. I'm eating tons of protein- I'm supposed to be eating 80 grams a day, but usually am getting between 60 and 75. It's been tough since eating in general isn't very fun.

I had the flu on Saturday and spent the afternoon/evening barfing up everything I consumed- including 7-up. The flu combined with pregant-woman-needing-food-in-her-body added up to be quite miserable. Eric took care of the family and house while I layed in bed for the majority of 21 hours.

I've been "sleep-eating" as my friend's husband, Joe, put it. My midwife suggested that when I can't fall back asleep in the middle of the night, I should eat a pb sandwich. So now I have a tupperware next to my bed that I frequent regularly for a protein fix. I gotta say, it works! I hope it doesn't start a bad habit.

I'm starting to grow out of my clothes and am in an awkward stage- maternity clothes don't quite fit me, but my slutty tight regular pants are way too uncomfortable. So... fleece pants every day is working just fine for now.

I still want to put up Cal and Ike's birth stories. Soon.

Grooming

Well, I've officially given up. I realized today that I haven't used a q-tip in weeks. And today, I got a compliment on my hair but I haven't washed it (or even gotten it wet) in probably three days. I'm disgusting. My leg hair is like a man's (and we won't even talk about the other area). I did, however, finally shave my pits since I wore a light yellow shirt and thought people may be able to see through it...
I have nail polish on my big toes from last summer.
Make-up? Psh.
And since I haven't showered, I truly haven't put on deodorant in days.

I just realized all this. I'm disgusting. I'm the smelly girl in class. And my friends are too kind to tell me.

Calvin the big brother

Calvin has been so sweet during this pregnancy. He is so excited about this next baby and talks about it all the time.

*Whenever he sees a baby toy, he asks if it's for the baby or says, "I bet the new baby will like this. We can save it."

*He cuddled with me the other day but quickly sat up after a second and asked, "Am I hurting the baby?"

*Jess took him to a playgroup and the kids all went around and said their names and something they were excited about. Cal said, "My name is Cal. And I'm excited about the new baby that's in my mom's belly."

*He announced (before I was announcing) to his whole sunday school class that I'm having a baby.

Baby Names

As some of you know, Eric and I made a silly bet about a food in front of some of his co-workers. He lost the naming rights to this baby. Afterward he said, "Well, I'm assuming you will still keep my opinions in mind when you are making this decision. That's what I would do."

He still does not like any of my names: Penelope, Veronica, Rose and Margot. It's very sad.

Problems...

Last week was the worst morning of my life. I had major... um, digestion issues and was stuck in the bathroom for three hours. Thank God it's all over now. I'm also thankful that:

* a lady from church who is currently unemployed was here playing with the kids.
* my friend, Laura, came by with some drug store necessities.
* Eric was able to come home unnecessarily when I thought he had to drive me to the hospital.
* my midwife gave me some liquid magnesium to take daily so that I will never be in that position again.

I'm traumatized and may need therapy. But for now, you all get to hear my ramblings.

Midwife

Eric and I ended up choosing the midwife and the birthing center that I linked to below. We are still not absolutely sure that we won't have this baby at home (Eric is denial about that one) but it's most likely it will be at the b.c. since it's probably much cheaper.

We are meeting with them for our first appt (besides meeting her) this Friday. I'm very excited. She's a Dr. in nutrition so I know I'm going to hear all sorts of great advice. And then have to apply it.

The Meds

Thank you for praying, all. The insurance company has agreed to cover the Zofran for a while longer. I'm still not feeling awesome (puked my guts out last night) but much better than when I'm w/o the stuff. So.. yeah. That's good.

Baby Update

Since I still don't know what midwife I'm going with, I've been seeing the doctors that delivered Ike. They recommended an ultrasound since we weren't exactly sure how far along I am. I thought I was 9 weeks last week, but they heard the heartbeat and that's rare. So today, I went in for the ultrasound:The little thing protruding from the face is not a growth- it's her hand that she was holding up to her head. Isn't she sweet? We saw her little heart beating. She was sleeping for a bit of it.

It looks like I'm 11 weeks along- not 10! I'm so thankful that I'm one week closer to feeling better!

The reason I'm calling this baby a "she:"
- I've been ridiculously sick and am even feeling awful taking Zofran. What's up with that? My boys did not beat me up this way.
- According to the new due date (8.10), this is a condom baby. Female sperm are much more resiliant.

They did give me a 3-d picture but I'm ignoring it. She looks lumpy, boxy and alienesque (after all, she IS only 9 weeks old!).

Breakfast

My new favorite breakfast (and I could eat this for lunch and dinner, too, probably):

Fiber One pancake mix with protein powder added to it. Then I smother peanut butter all over the pancakes and drizzle them with syrup. Yummmm.

I've also been eating healthier, TANYA. Bananas, apples, hummus, whole grain bread, chicken and yogurt have all been in the menu the past couple days. I'm still not eating very many veggies, but feeling good about the future.

Note: My insurance has cut me off on the Zofran. :( Please pray that they accept the request form we sent in and buy me those $7/each pills. Thank you.

Belly

At night, my stomach is literally farther (further?) out than my boobs already. Although, I know that's not saying much.

Food

When I went to the doctor a couple weeks ago to get Zofran for my nausea, she specifically told me that I need to worry less about nutrition and more about calories- since I just wasn't eating or drinking enough. That made me happy.

And since getting on the prescription, I am slowly able to eat more food. This weekend, I even ate enchilidas, raw yellow peppers with hummus, and peanut butter (I couldn't eat pb all through my pregnancy with Ike- it's just too potent).

This baby prefers empty carbs, however, so my main source of calories is Doritos. I've also enjoyed bagels, pastries, muffins, chocolate covered pretzels (could really use some of those right now) and more Doritos.

I'm pretty sure I am at a healthy caloric intake right now, even if most of those calories are bad. I keep thinking that when I feel better, I'll start eating better. After all, I don't naturally eat this nasty. Really.

Names

One of my favorite names was just taken by a new baby at church: Naomi Rose. I'm very sad but will just have to get over it.

Calvin says that if we have a girl, he wants to name her Hamburger. I don't know where he got this? Anyone? Other names he likes: Susan, Jack and Zack.

We will definitely have a hard time if we have a boy. And there are so many wonderful girl names, there will be trouble choosing. I REALLY love Penelope (Penny for short) but Eric doesn't liek it and then we found out it means "Dream Weaver" which sounds sort of new-agey for me. So I'm letting it go.

Birthing Center

The birthing center that I'm leaning toward: http://www.health-foundations.com/home
It's in St. Paul about 20 minutes away. We are in the process of checking out insurance costs.

8 weeks

Seriously? Already?

Where?

Options: Hospital, birthing center, home.

I have been interested in giving birth at home. A few of my friends have done it recently and all loved it. It seems intimate and comfortable. And statistics show that when the mother is comfortable with her surroundings, the labor progresses faster.

I don't think hospitals are evil. But I really want someone to deliver this baby that I know and that knows me. There are not any options that I know of that will fulfill this want. There are groups of midwives- I meet a different one each month. For the delivery, I may have met her, I may have not. Plus, even midwives sometimes don't get there until right before pushing (which is what doctors are known for- let's face it- it's the nurses that take care of us the first laboring hours).

Since finding out that insurance does not cover home births, I've become interested in a birthing center. I've visited one and will go to another this weekend. I'm pretty excited. These midwives love what they do. And I get to be a part of a natural birth! I'm extremely scared (both boys were born with a needle in my back), but excited, too. I will get to walk around, eat and drink what I want and yell loudly (I'm assuming). And I'll get to give birth in water if I want. And then I get to take a long nap (4-6 hours) in a comfy queen bed.

We haven't ruled out any options. If you want to post your opinion (without judging me or others), let's have it!

Coming soon: Past births and why I don't love looking back on them.

Apathy

Life is good. And it's getting better. But a week ago, when I was wallowing, here are the things I no longer cared about (and some I still don't):

- My clothes- I've been wearing the same fleece pj pants and Wheaties sweatshirt for three days straight. And no bra.
- Cleanliness - I keep putting the same socks on.
- Laundry - a good reason why I keep putting the same socks on.
- Grooming- My lack of eyebrow maintenance has made me look quite similiar to a gorilla.
- Seeing my friends - this is not a bash to you. This just shows how extreme this has become. Me not caring if I see others? What the heck?
- Chores- My main man has been showing his love by going above and beyond in this area.
- Eating - It's getting better. I think I'm up to about 1000 calories a day. Food is soooo gross to me right now.

Girl or Boy?

Everyone keeps asking if we are hoping for a girl. I would love a little girl and when I picture this baby, I picture a girl. But there are many pros for each gender.

Pros for having a boy: We know boys since we already have two. My two are the most opposite of any two boys so I think I can handle any inbetween. We have a ton of boy stuff. Our house is very boy- rowdy, loud and has lots of trucks. (Cons: This one will be farther apart in age and will not have the bond that my other two have)

Pros for having a girl: It may balance out our home a little bit. It will be different. And seriously- the clothes and cloth diapers! So cute. (Cons: Teenage girls... augh; the drama)

So, thankfully, I don't have to make this decision. I'm leaving it in God's hands and am trusting that He knows what He's doing. We are probably going to find out the sex so that I can be ready with all the necessary items.

Next time- Where to give birth...

Supplements

Here is what I'm currently taking in my pregnant state:

Women's multi-vitamin (since the prenatals made me sick)
Folic Acid (so baby doesn't get Spina Bifida)
Unisom (sleep-aid plus anti-nausea)
Vitamin B-6 (anti-nausea)
Magnesium (since I haven't pooped in 5 days)
Zofran (a prescription anti-nausea)

I'm amazed at how UNnatural pregnancy is for being so.. organic. How did the women in the past do it without all these drugs and supplements? Before I started taking the Zofran, I lost 7 pounds in 4 weeks and was eating possibly 500 calories a day. Now that I'm taking it, I am still barely eating 1000 calories a day.

I keep telling myself that the misery is temporary. I'm 7 1/2 weeks along and I'm guessing I will be feeling crappy until about 14 weeks (since that's how long I felt sick with my second).

First Comes Love

We weren't expecting to be pregnant, but it wasn't completely a surprise when it happened. There are just no good forms of birth control (that I'm comfortable with) so we have been charting (and not very well, it seems).

So when the puking, exhaustion, crabbiness and an all-around blah feeling started to happen, it just didn't come naturally for me to be excited about this new life growing inside me- complete with heartbeat and soul.

Since I'm assuming no one wants to hear me ramble on in my self-pity, I'm starting this blog. This is my third pregnancy, but who knew it could be so different already?